Swearing (Cursing, Cussing), Racial Insults,
& Other Inappropriate Language
Brenda realizes that he has just completed 6 calculus problems using the wrong procedures. Disgusted with this realization, she impulsively reflects her self-anger by saying “Son of a b-----“.
Kyle and Cecil do not like each other. One day ,they bump into each other trying to enter through the classroom door. Kyle calls Cecil a negative term used to describe people of his (Cecil’s) heritage/race/country of origin.
Whether they’re uttered out of frustration; or used to gain attention, present a “tough” image, or hurt another, certain words and phrases are inappropriate in the school setting (and other gatherings that demand restrained and respectful phrasing). Typically, the behavior is ingrained, a bad habit so to speak, and requires intervention on our part. Typically, we must first make the student aware of the behavior and it’s inappropriateness in the classroom. Once awareness is developed, our attempts to change the behavior will be more effective. This page contains a wide selection of strategies to use with students who curse, cuss, and use negative terms to insult others.
1. Praise the student for any appropriate use of language
2. Use self-monitoring: Have the student rate his own behavior.
· Have the student mark down a minus for each time he curses in a day or a class period, and give him a reward if he gets less than 5 minuses (or another number based on your observation of the frequency of the behavior). Lower the goal number closer to 0 as s/he improves.
· Or have him rate himself on a Likert scale after each class period or activity from 0-5 (a 0 translates to “frequently cursed” and a 5 converts to “did not curse at all”). Reward him/her each time s/he gets a certain number of points that have been set a goal.
3. Identify the antecedent that brings about the undesired language. Try to eliminate that stimulus, or teach the student substitute words to use in such a situation. S/he can even make use of invented words to express the anger and frustration (e.g.,“Oh, shmeckeldoody”.
4. Dr. Mac's book, The Behavior Survival Guide for Kids discusses making smart choices for dealing with emotions in chapter 4. It suggests teaching the student to “Stop, Think, Choose, Think Again.” In this method, the student stops before speaking, thinks about what he is about to say, chooses which words he wants to use, and then thinks about whether or not this choice was a good one. Give the student visual cues to remind her to make good choices.
5. Talk to the student’s parents and find out if there is anything new or stressful going on at home. Ask the parents if they have heard their child talking in this manner and if so, how they react to it. Encourage them to hold the youngster to similar standards of acceptable language at home. Ask them to model non-caustic language for their youngster.
6. Respond to inappropriate language with a simple, calm response… or just ignore the language all together. You might matter-of-factly say, “Those aren't very nice words to say.” Or consistently give a one word response, like “Inappropriate”, or a one-word reminder, like “Language”.
7. Teach your students that words can hurt others as with physical violence. Children by nature are caring and sympathetic beings. However, they sometimes need to be taught how to avoid destructive verbal violence.
8. Have a zero tolerance policy towards such language. Respond with a matter-of-fact, “That’s a word we don’t use in our classroom” and never accept that kind of language. Once you set limits, stick to them. Penalties may have to be implemented, but progress should receive a positive reaction. Do not get frustrated if the behavior escalates before it becomes extinct. Often, the behavior worsens before it goes away. Nevertheless, remain consistent in your expectations and response in order to promote extinction of the language pattern. Remember that it can take a very long time to change verbal behavior, which has become instinctive and habitual.
9. Be consistent in how you respond to the undesired behavior. Once you choose a strategy to address the inappropriate speech, use that strategy each and every time the student exhibits the inappropriate behavior for at least one or two weeks before implementing a different strategy.
10. Let your students know that if they are unsure about whether something is appropriate to say, they can ask you for guidance. By making the teachers the authorities on appropriate and inappropriate language, the students can find out which words are appropriate and which are not without disturbing the class by verbalizing the undesired word. Allow students to ask the teacher about the words privately and then wait for the teacher’s response before using the word in front of the whole class.
11. Set up a classroom rule about language. Then convene a class discussion about appropriate and inappropriate language and making good choices about language. Review the classroom rules and standards often, perhaps using examples of appropriate and inappropriate language.
12. Make use of “the sandwich technique”. Start a conversation with with the student by saying something positive. Then give constructive criticism and suggestions. End the conversation with a positive statement. For example, “It is great that you were able to identify your emotion and told me that you were angry. I hope that next time you will use appropriate words even if you are mad. What are some more acceptable words that you could have used in that situation? (Have the student list them, then practice their use with you). I know that for next time you will try to choose even more descriptive appropriate words to express your emotions, because I have seen you do it before.” Make sure that the student hears that you believe in his/her ability to utter the correct language.
13. Give students two good options in order to eliminate the bad one. For example, say, “That word is not okay in school. I can see that you are upset, so you have two choices: You can (a) take a deep belly breath and find your words, or (b) talk to a teacher about what is making your upset.” Model and practice how to take a deep “belly breath” and find “good words” to express emotions.
14. Give proximity praise. Ignore the child’s inappropriate language, and praise the students around him for using appropriate words. As one example: “I love how Jane is working quietly.”, or “Tyrone, thanks for using polite words during the disagreement.” As another example: "I like how you are talking nicely with your table partners! You are using respectful words to decide on how to proceed with the project!" Hopefully, the student of concern will notice the behavior of the praised students and try getting attention in that manner (instead of using inappropriate language). This technique also helps keep the other students focused on what they should be doing, so that they do not seek teacher attention via inappropriate language useage.
15. Talk to your students about the environments in which their language may be acceptable (i.e., on the streetcorner), and in which environments it is not appropriate (i.e. in a future workplace, at an interview, meeting a boy/girlfriend’s parents, on school grounds, etc.). Explain to them that it is difficult to switch gears from speaking and acting one way, to talking and behaving in another. Therefore, they can start to practice switching gears by withholding hurtful or caustic language when in school, even though they may use it at home or on the streets. Make the rule that: “If you can’t say it in church, you can’t say it in our classroom.”
16. Ask the students to use more creative language in their insults. Print out copies of the Shakespearean Insult Generator from: http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/shake_rule.html
and teach the students how to use it to come up with more artistic language for their insults. Every time that a student uses an “old” insult, ask him to rephrase it in more poetic language. Another good example of well-worded insults can be found in the famous phrases of author Mark Twain (e.g., He’s a good man in the worst sense of the word.”)
17. Implement bibliotherapy (see the page of this title at www.BehaviorAdvisor.com). Select a book that addresses word useage and choosing more appropriate .
18. Utilize the Ten-R. After each time that the student uses inappropriate language, go through the following tens steps in order:
1. Response cost (penalty). When a non-acceptable action is displayed, remove a pre-determined amount of reinforcer (e.g., free time, points) as the student states which rules were broken. The amount to be lost is known to all students because of your discussions with them.
2. Relaxation. Have the student go to a preassigned place (e.g., a mat, carrel, or corner) and relax himself/herself. S/he summons you when calm. If the voice is excited or sarcastic in tone, or if the muscles appear tense (You may want to lightly shake his arm or leg to monitor muscle tension. The arm should "wobble".) tell him/her to continue to attempt to become calm and relaxed.
3. Rectify. Have the student provide restitution for any physical/emotional damage done. This payback may involve repair of items, an apology to another, or repayment for damage.
4. Recognize. Help the student to recognize the cause of his misbehavior and identify more appropriate responses for that situation (The classroom counseling link on the www.behavioradvisor.com home page may be useful here).
5. Rehearsal. Have the student practice the alternative behavior(s) identified in Step 4. The roleplaying situation should be similar to the event which was handled inappropriately by the student.
6. Reinforce. Reinforce, praise or otherwise reward the student for having demonstrated appropriate behavior. Encourage more of the behavior in the future. Also reinforce the behavior when it is later displayed by the student.
7. Reflect. Ask the student to identify the consequences of his disruptive behavior and compare them with the possible consequences of the desired action. This analysis helps the student to see the benefits of proper behavior.
8. Re-enter. The student has missed anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours during this session. S/he should finish all work missed, or be returned to the least pleasant activity that was missed. This action ensures that these sessions do not become a learned way to avoid certain schoolwork.
9. Record. Record data to assist in evaluating the long term effectiveness of this intervention.
10. Repeat. Use this technique as necessary to change behavior.
(Excerptedl from: www.behavioradvisor.com/10RPlan.html)
19. Schedule a meeting with the student and his/her parents to discuss the student’s verbal behavior and attempt to devise solutions.
20. Teach the other students how to cope with and handle this student’s negative verbal comments. Inform them that this student actually conveying, via his/her language, that s/he is experiencing difficulty in handling his/her emotions. Provide them with verbal responses to this language so that they can help the youngster phrase things more appropriately (e.g., “I don’t like to hear those words.”, “Please tell me what you want so that we can solve this problem.”, “If you want something, you’re going to have to talk to me nicely.”).
21. Record the student’s performance in withholding negative utterances. Place the data on a monthly chart in order to monitor progress toward the goal.
22. To draw attention to the behavior in older students, say “Is that the same mouth that you eat with?” Or “I hope that that isn’t the same mouth you use to kiss your mother.” After attention has been gained, open a discussion on when and where the words are appropriate and not.
23. Investigate whether the student may be experiencing verbal tics over which there is little control. Cursing is rarely, but sometimes a symptom of Tourettes Syndrome.
Resources
http://www.keepkidshealthy.com/parenting_tips/cursing.html. Helpful suggestions for dealing with foul language.
http://www.cusscontrol.com Helpful suggestions for dealing with offensive language.
*This book can be purchased at any on-line book store, but buying it from Amazon.com
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Elana Cohn submitted this list of strategies while a graduate student in the Behavior Disorders Program of the Department of Special Education at
Thanks Elana!
Contributions to this paper were made by Tom McIntyre.
Posted to www.BehaviorAdvisor.com on 7/4/06